The Punctuation Dialogue Page
VK: Punctuation is the way sentences take a breath.
Larry: Punctuation is the way words can spit.
VK: Punctuation lets you scream across a page.
Larry: Punctuation means never having to say your sorry.
VK: Huh?
Larry: We were just getting a little to weird with all that punctuation stuff. I don't even like punctuation!
VK: What's to like?
Larry: I like not having some uptight English teacher using her red pencil all over my paper.
VK: What's the problem?
Larry: I just never know when to use those commas, when not to use those commas. . .
VK: But you're an expert at using punctuation. You use it perfectly when you speak.
Larry: Even I know punctuation is for writing.
VK: Yup. What punctuation does for writing is what you naturally do when you speak. You raise your voice, or have a pause, or ask a question.
Larry: But I don't have any teacher marking up my conversation. There really is a difference, Kryston, and you know it.
VK: Hmmm. You're right. And some of the differences are pretty arbitrary. I admit that, but punctuation is all we have to make written words "sound" like spoken words.
Larry: And you're going to cure all of my anxiety!
VK: And you're going to cure all of my anxiety?
Larry: And you're going to cure all of my anxiety? Hey, this is fun.
VK: Didja ever think you'd be saying punctuation is fun?
Larry: I take it back. Punctuation sucks. That's the accepted opinion of students, and I shall not break it!
VK: I think you mean that not knowing how to use punctuation sucks. That getting lower grades suck. That feeling you are a failure as a human being...
Larry: OK! OK! And I just work this program of yours and none of them things will ever happen again.
VK: "Those things"
Larry: What things?
VK: You said, "them things"; you should say, "Those things."
Larry: See! Now you're doing it. How am going to get revenge?
VK: I can think of two ways. One, learn enough punctuation to be able to correct your teachers.
Larry: I like it. What's the other way.
VK: Become an English teacher.
Larry: GASP!!
VK: Larry! Are you OK? Larry! Speak to me! You're turning purple. Larry. . .Larry?
